Tuesday, January 22, 2013

The power of a positive no (Become Best Family)

The power of a positive no (Become Best Family)
The power of a positive no
The power of a positive no (Become Best Family) - Research suggests speech communication 'no' isn't the foremost effective thanks to discipline a toddler. Purvaja Sawant talks to consultants to seek out a cheerful answer for folks and kids. Disciplining a toddler is each parent's worst nightmare. After all, it's one in all the foremost troublesome jobs within the world, one that does not go with associate manual. And whereas parenting will be rewardable, additional usually than not, it's frustrating. No surprise once it involves chastising their kids, today, oldsters square measure usually caught speech communication 'No' or 'Don't' — sometimes resorting to negative reinforcement. however square measure these extremely effective in disciplining your child?

A simple 'no' will be additional harmful than you're thinking that
Believe it or not, per a UCLA ( University of Golden State, Los Angeles) study, a median nipper hears the word 'no' over four hundred times a day! No surprise, by the time kids hit their teens, most of them become resistant to the word. however since the pattern of speaking and learning is established early during a child's developing years, and sometimes continues until their adult lives, it breeds gall during a kid, particularly against the fogeys. In some extreme cases, it will desensitise him/ her to its that means, therefore planting seeds for future rebellion. Salony Priya, message man of science, UN agency recently control a workshop for folks on disciplining kids, reveals, "By speech communication 'no' to a toddler, oldsters expect to create him/her perceive that their behaviour is unacceptable. However, the manner you say 'no' is additional necessary than the word itself. Non-verbal cues sort of a positive visual communication ensures the message is distributed to the kid properly. Also, terribly young kids do not reply to 'no' as desired as a result of the eye they get from their oldsters once they have done one thing wrong is way additional."
Use positive terms and words
It's not perpetually possible or doable to fulfil your child's each whim and fancy. therefore additional usually than not, you'll need to deny him. however once you do therefore, attempt victimisation constructive ways in which, in order that you'll get your purpose across during a positive manner. important person Pooja Bedi, mother of 2 adolescent youngsters, says, "I've realized, a blanket no isn't a decent answer, particularly once you square measure managing associate inquisitive and curious mind of a toddler. Unless you notify your kids why you're refusing them one thing, they're going to ne'er respect the word 'no'." She believes that rather than speech communication an on the spot no, oldsters have to be compelled to provide them an alternate or choice, that makes them feel that they're given a good alternative.
When Kunal Shukla, engineer, should refuse his six-year-old girl, he explains to her why he is doing therefore. "Though my girl remains young, I perpetually provide her applicable reasons, whenever i do not provide her one thing that she needs. This way, she grows up learning that there's a proof on why I actually have taken that call. Giving her a justification can sharpen her reasoning skills, and additionally build her realise that i do not say no for everything."
Sreenanda Roy, a woman of the house UN agency includes a 12-year-old girl, says, "You have to be compelled to set the proper example for your kids by victimisation positive reinforcement. you want to practise what you preach. If you do not, the kid can get confused and become old to be rebellious and stubborn. Discipline solely becomes a problem once youngsters square measure confused concerning their wrong doing and don't apprehend higher than the choice they need. oldsters apprehend higher, and conveyancing it within the right manner can confirm the message registers permanently."
Mistakes oldsters build
Bribing your kid too often: once you perpetually bribe them to follow rules, eventually they're going to suppose that they will manipulate you.
Not practising what you preach:
When oldsters do not follow what they are saying, kids become old basic cognitive process they do not mean what they are saying.
Having unrealistic  expectations:
Pushing kids to realize what you're thinking that could also be right for them does not permit them to grow at their own pace.
Setting a poor example: kids observe, learn and ape their oldsters, whether or not it is the manner they speak, behave, act or react to things.
Confusing penalisation with discipline: whereas discipline teaches a toddler a way to suppose and be accountable for their decisions, penalisation instills worry of pain.
Creative alternatives to speech communication 'no'
While managing kids, specialize in positive disciplining, supported the principles of listening, understanding then steering, rather than beginning with a 'no' then continuing to empty threats, or victimisation power on the kid. In short, follow the T-A-L-K model. we tend to tell you ways... Tell the kid what does one need instead of stopping him by speech communication NO.
Ask him/her an issue to know why he/she is doing a specific action and what the intention behind the action might be.
Listen to what {the kid|the kid} should say; it'll modify you to know your kid better; and vice-versa Kindle a want in your child to concentrate to you and communicate with you freely.

The power of a positive no (Become Best Family)

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